Smiling Dolphin!

CANDLE IN THE WINDOW !

memory lane-1

I don't wanna go to school

It's early morning, and Mrs. Smith is trying to awaken her son Jimmy.
"Wake up, Jimmy!" she shouts from downstairs, "it's six-thirty,
time to get up and go to school!"
"Aw, Mom," Jimmy shouts back, "I don't wanna go to school!"
"Come on, Jimmy!" she says as she walks into his room, "you gotta go!"
"No, Mom," protests Jimmy, in tears, "I hate school! The kids hate me,
the teachers hate me, even the janitor hates me!"
"Jimmy, come on, get up, you gotta go!" says Mrs. Smith, pulling him out
of the bed, "you are forty years old, and you are the headmaster!"

Gandhi R.K.Laxman ke kalam se

COMBING ON A BALDED HEAD WITH FIVE COMBS

GOL MAAL(1979)

Gol Maal (Devnagari: गोल माल, meaning unclear, uncertain movie directed by ) is a 1979 Bollywood comedyHrishikesh Mukherjee. The film was produced by Mukherjee and N.C.Sippy with music by Rahul Dev Burman.

Gol Maal could be translated as "Risky/Crooked Business" or "Hanky Panky". It is the story of a fun loving and happy-go-lucky guy Ramprasad Dashrathprasad Sharma (Amol Palekar), who is a chartered accountant and is looking out for a job. His uncle advises him to seek employment at his friend Bhavani Shankar's (Utpal Dutt) firm who is a very strict person and has a fascination for Indian values and the "moustache". He believes that a moustache represents one's conscience. Mr Shankar is ready to pay a few hundred rupees as salary to a young, inexperienced man as long as he fits his values. On his uncle's advice Ramprasad gets a job by exaggerating his Indian values (by wearing an excessively short kurta pajama instead of his usual flashy shirts, using his full name without abbreviations, simulating ignorance of music and sports and demonstrating professionalism.)

SCIENTIST SINGARAM-Cartoon

DHONDHI

CREATE YOUR OWN JOKE

Use your imagination and create your own joke for this cartoon!,and pat on your own shoulders,if no one appreciate you!

123

BILL BOARD CARTOON FROM AMUL

NOSTALGIC AJIT JOKES

Ajit ki 2crore ki lottery nikali
Robert: Lottery wala apko tax kat kar 1cr 75 lakh dega boss.
Ajit: yeh galat hai, mujhe pure 2cr do, nahin to mera 10 Rs. wapas karo.


A crow shits on Ajit, Mona gives him a tissue paper
Ajit: koi fayda nahin Mona, kauwa to udd gaya!


Ajit: Rabert meri aur meri girlfriend ki shaadi hone wali hai
Robert: Kab boss?
Ajit: meri 14 Jan ko aur uski 20 Feb ko.

Robert: Boss agar aapko garmi lage to aap kya karte ho?
Ajit: main cooler ke samne baith jata hu
Robert: Phir bhi garmi lage to?
Ajit: to cooler chala leta hun.

Ajit, pointing towards prisoner, says to Robert: “Iisko duster se maar dalo, yeh mar bhi jayega aur mit bhi jayega.”

Ajit: “Robert, dayna (Diana) ko kuch khatta pila do.”
Robert: “Kyu boss?”
Ajit: “Bewkoof, woh dayna se daynasour ho jayegi, phir extinct kar dena.”

Ajit: “Robert, is bull ka stool test karo. Aakhir pataa to chale ki ye bullshit kya cheez hai.”

Ajit: “Robert, isey peacock poison pila do, yeh more sey no-more ho jayegaa...”

Rawbert: Boss, China se Mr.Hu aayee hain.
Ajit: Goli maar do. Hu mar jaane par humor ban ke sab ko hasayenge.

Ajit: Maikal, ise liquid helium mein daal ke 440 V pass kar do. Phir yeh superconductor ban jaayega, aur zindagi bhar ticket kaat-ta reh jaayega!

Maikal: Baaas, yeh aadmi to kuch bol hi nahin raha hai. Kya karen?
Ajit: Ise revaalving chair mein daal do. Pata chal jaayega chakkar kya hai.

Ajit: Raaberrt, Mona ke dono hathon ko kaat do.
Rawbert: Magar kyoon baas?
Ajit: Typing to nahi atee, kamsekam shaarthand to seekh legi.

CROW SENSE

Earlier I posted a cartoon in this blog depicting the creativity of the crow.Now read this....

New Caledonian crows, famed for their tool-making skills, can also use tools to manipulate other tools. Such “metatool” use shows that the crows have the brainpower to apply their skills to a completely new situation and plan ahead to solve a task, researchers believe.

Working with captured wild crows, Russell Gray and his team from the University of Auckland in New Zealand hid a treat in a box so that a crow could only extract it with the help of a long stick. This kind of task is easy for the tool-using crows.

But then the researchers added a twist by placing the long stick in a cage, out of the crows' reach. No problem: the birds used a second, shorter stick, to get the first one, then took it back to the box to get the food.

“Six out of seven crows tried straight away to use the short stick to get to the long tool. There was no trial and error,” says Gray.

Cognitive complexity

Metatool use is normally only seen in humans and apes. Even monkeys struggle in similar experiments. This is thought to be due to the cognitive complexity of the task, which requires using a tool on an intermediate object in a novel context before tackling the real goal, which is to extract the food.

Gray believes that the best explanation for such flexible, hierarchical behaviour is that the crows are using "analogical reasoning", applying previous experience – tool gets food - to solve a novel, but structurally similar problem – tool gets tool gets food.

But Sabine Tebbich from the University of St Andrews in Scotland, who wasn't involved in the study, thinks that while the crows' behaviour in this experiment is “truly remarkable”, it is too early to make claims about analogical reasoning, because wild crows tend to use tools to explore their environment.

“We can't rule out that they have done similar tasks before in the wild,” she says. More experiments are needed to show how the crows are reasoning, she says.

Nathan Emery from the University of Cambridge, UK, however, who recently found evidence for analogical reasoning in the food-hiding behaviour of closely related birds, says the crows probably use similar cognitive skills. “This study shows their ability to plan a few steps ahead and demonstrates another striking convergence between crow and ape intellectual abilities,” he says.

• 16 August 2007
• NewScientist.com news service
• Nora Schultz

! !! !!!

"I'm so poor I can't even pay attention."

I DON'T KNOW WHY ?

1.Why our leaders say Hindi is our National Language and put their children in
    English Medium schools?
2.Why it is called Life Insurance?
3.Why some Private schools are called Public Schools ?
4.Why a Muslim/Christian cannot adopt a child in India?
5.Why torn currency notes loose value?
6.Why second Saturday is a holiday?

BRAZILLION

GLASNOST

Mr.G the Genius Gadha

"An idiot with a computer is a faster, better idiot" - Rich Julius

1. One day Mr. G seriously went to the backyard of his house and started trying to shake the well before taking a tonic.B'cos in the tonic bottle it's written as "Shake well before use" !!!

2. One night Mr. G was searching something under a streetlight.His friend came and asked "Hey G what are you doing here ... ?"Mr. G : "I lost my ring"His friend : "Exactly where you lost ?"Mr. G: "Near the corner of next street "His friend : "Then why you are searching here ... go and search there "Mr. G : "Ya. That's right. But there's no street light in that street. So, how can I search in the dark ? That's why I'm searching here !!!"

3. One day Mr.G's little son was filling up an application and asked Mr.G what to write in the "Mother Tongue:...." field.Mr.G simply said 'write approximately 6 cm' .

Now I hope you understood who is Mr.G ...!click here:http://sikkimpendamview.blogspot.com/

HELL

An Indian dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes first to the German hell and asks "What do they do here?" He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.

Then he comes to the Indian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks "What do they do here?"

He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour.Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Indian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

But that is exactly the same as all the other hells - why are there so many people waiting to get in? "Because maintenance is so bad >that>>the electric chair does not work, someone has stolen all the nails from the bed, and the devil is a former Govt servant, so he comes in, signs the register and then goes to the cafeteria..."

LICE-CONTROL

Humosapien! Aping!

PENCIL POWER(A JOKE)

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.

The Russians used a pencil.

BARBERSHOP

A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. - he placed the boy in the chair.

"I'm goin' to buy a green tie to wear for the parade," he said. "I'll be back in a few minutes."When the boy's haircut was completed and the man still hadn't returned, the barber said, "Looks like your Daddy's forgotten all about you.""That wasn't my daddy," said the boy. "He just walked up, took me by the hand and said, 'Come on, son, we're gonna get a free haircut!'"

COMMUNICATION DISEASE

Some researchers say, mobile phones emit harmful radiation which may affect our health.I noticed ,these signals easily penetrate inside a ship or train(built by thick iron sheets) where no other radio waves reach.If this coninues then doctors will need to know our mobile brands and the model number to understand the level of radiation for further treatment.

WATER WORLD

Its bizzare, the price of water is more than milk in some parts of India.I paid 12 Rs. for one litre bottled water and paid only 10 Rs. for a ltr. of Milk. Bharat mein dhoodh ki nadhiyan behathi thi/hai !

Did You Brushed?

Different angle!

Its free free world

English trouble!

The thirsty CROW

New age crow!

SOME ORIGINAL CARTOONS

Here I am posting some original cartoons .Enjoy and comment.